Saturday, April 2, 2011

B is for Babies

I'm a planner by nature. There are a few things that are tough to plan -- writing and publishing, for instance, refuse so far to submit to a calendar -- but I plan everything I possibly can. I used to have a career flowchart hanging on the wall of my bedroom, with various divergences planned for in multi-color Sharpie.

I've grown out of that, a little, but not much.

When MJ and I first married, we said it was nice we were marrying a little younger than most of our family and friends did. We'd have a few years together to just enjoy being, and then we could start a family while we were younger, too. We thought we'd have our first baby at 27 or so, which happens to be the age I am now (with 28 rapidly approaching).

But then the career plans and the budget plans and the travel plans overtook the early baby thoughts.  I want to run just one more marathon before I settle into the walking-and-yoga routine typical of pregnant ladies. I'd like to have X dollars in the bank. I want to go to England, Ireland, France and Japan before we give up traveling for a season. I had to finish grad school pre-baby. I must finish up 3 years at my present assignment and settle into a new job before we have a baby. I should sell a book first, maybe two, because who knows what the baby will do to my writing equilibrium.

That's a lot of To Do pre-baby. It pushed the baby schedule out into my early 30's.

And lately? I'm not sure I care about any of it.  I just want to have a baby, and let the plans work themselves out. No Sharpies or schedules.

That feels a little scary.

8 comments:

Old Kitty said...

Awwwww!!! Congratulations!!! Wow - that;s a wonderful decision to make!! Awww you're both gonna be great parents!!! Yay!! B is definitely for beautiful Babies!!!

Take care
x

Jemi Fraser said...

Babies are wonderful & they definitely supercede any schedules & plans!!!

Grammy said...

Hi, I had my babies at ages 19 and 23 and I'm so glad I did! Now at the age of nearly 78, I have 5 grown grandchildren and 7 great grands to enjoy and they have a grandma who is still able to get around and enjoy being with them. Hurray for babies! Go for it, girl, and forget the scheduling!
Ruby

Jen Daiker said...

Great B. I have moments where I have to decide what I'm willing to give up to get what I really want.

I'm not in the baby stage yet but I do know it's rapidly approaching. I guess the point is that you'll eventually realize when you'll stop waiting and go for what you want.

Congrats.

Lisa of In Pencil said...

First of all, Grammy in a few comments up is amazing- how cool that she's reading blogs and has 7 great grandchildren and an active life...Second, its great that you're just going with it. For the record though, you can still do many of those things with a child (for instance, if you every think that you can't travel and go to x place b/c of a baby,just remember there ARE babies in those places...and their parents get around just fine with them) & if you are a runner now odds are your doctor will be ok with you continuing to run throughout your pregnancy (I once thought you had to "take it easy" but in most pregnancies you can still say very active)...Best of luck to you & your husband.

Ellen Brickley said...

I've constantly struggled with the question of whether I want children rather than when, so it's good to know that once the decision has been made, the journey doesn't stop for us overthinkers!

I say if the time is right for you and MJ in your hearts, feck the planning.

On the travel thing, I read this article recently and you might like it: http://offbeatmama.com/2011/02/travel-with-baby

erica and christy said...

No one can tell you when it's the right time. If you guys think you're ready, you're ready. Even if you think you aren't, you're probably ready. Two pink lines can change minds pretty easily!!
erica

Eliza said...

Just go for it, life is too short :-)